reunions


I am at that prime of life (yikes) when class reunions are ‘happening’. Thanks to Google, Face Book and other social networking sites that enable everything from hook ups to look up, my name are among the many entered in the search box.  Anyone curious or motivated enough to trace and track old classmates, distant relatives (even just a smidgen connected by blood), ex lovers, former crushes, friends from the old hood prowl the sites to send their hellos and how have you been.  I have searched, in that order, a college boyfriend; a high school crush; and people I worked with who interested me and had good times with but didn’t get to know more past the event or project.
I am curious but yellow.  I will search but not necessarily put out a friend request.

I am not one for adding so many names on my friends list either.  If you are on my list, it generally means I want to chat or meet up..really!  You would be someone who is likewise interested in who and what I am or do.  You are friend material; not someone who, right off, needs to sell me something or is building a network (unless it’s a fan page of a product I really, really like).

I don’t mind that you do it, eventually; just that it isn’t what motivates me. I have a small business selling baked goodies and I have this blog (that’s how I know not all the clicks here are from my friends – only a handful knew this is mine) but I don’t post either on my personal pages (if I go full scale pro at the biz, I’ll post on Multiply hehe). Oh, you could put two and two but it didn’t come from me.

Hmmm...does that make me a snob? I have decided not (hahaha quick answer)! User friendliness, while useful (duhh!) crosses a mighty thin line, especially when you have humbly and graciously said no to the offer and they are adamant persistence is a virtue.
When that happens I go to “edit friends” ; p


That’s one of the downsides.  Some guys you didn’t even exchange words with in high school now considers you a trophy Face Book friend, as I call it, reveling in the crumbs you tell so he can claim to know you more than the others.  Ex classmates you do add will tell you everything they’ve accomplished and at times, far too much information that I am sure they won’t share face to face. You are instantly a net confidant. People are a lot braver; conversing via PC or laptop tend to diffuse the emotional bits. 

I know lots of women whose boyfriends or husbands’ jilted or discarded lovers (the claim being true or not) and vice versa (gloating) tracked them down just so they could send nasty messages.  Disgusting! Whether you are out to gain points or prove it, it is still dirty laundry hanging on the comment thread.  How so telenovela of you!

I wonder why these get-tos happens in your forties and upwards.  I know reasons would be: you’d have accomplished much to boast about ; you’d have been settled and married that the life have softened and matured you to be the man or woman at peace with the world; you can afford to throw hundreds or thousandson that reunion vacay and dinners. 

Or: you need to accomplish more by selling stuff to more people; you are unsettled enough at the way your family life is going (or not– divorced, on the brink of, etc) that you miss the heyday you long to relive; you want to hook up with the one that got away.

I hope I don’t offend, but wouldn’t it have been better to reunite when you are still able to; dashing your fantasies (by making it real); and finding out early enough that it just doesn’t work? And if it did, that you are still free to claim it, without families to destroy in the process.

Isn’t it better to relive that high school crash and burn when you still have your hair and can pay damages? If you are unaccomplished, people can offer you jobs while you are still within the age limit (in the Philippines, age matters in certain industries).

If you are part of the networking sellers, you still have friends who have a bit of vanity left and (not family) money to spare on extras like glutathione and acai berry pills.

Isn’t it better to hunt and meet up with your one great love when there is a trace left of the prince charming  you once was and not so kingly – the bald, paunchy and smug-that-you-are-sooo-unforgettable kind.
Only Colin Firth in The King’s Speech can look dignified, stutter and all.  Love him best in that one, after his Uncle Jamie character in Love Actually - luv'ly, obliging man!  : )  

On the women’s side, it is so much pressure when told you were the stuff of dreams and you look down and thought oh boy, good that you were on chat and he has yet to find that now you are plain stuffed wahaha.  If we happen to have unresolved issues with you, it would really be great if there is still a point to the whole exercise of closure; that running away with you is not the guilt and shame laden, awkward picture of old goats sowing oatmeal but a romantic, swept off your feet story fit to tell the grand kids. 

So, we understand you now; so, you aren’t the complete ass we thought you were; so, you put us on a pedestal it’s a shame to taint us with your lowly human foibles and insecurities.  So what if you have a third wife and kids tucked away somewhere. Eeeeppp! You (the guy) may achieve closure by unloading your guilt but you could be dangling a carrot or a sword over women whose hopes still float. Closure does not guarantee an end to the what ifs; new found understanding may fuel more.

These are my questions.  Is it really possible to head off old age regrets and stave the hunger to wonder and wander so?   In the Philippines, we have a saying: nasa huli ang pagsisisi (regrets come way too late).  Excuse me, I think I’ll just go eat brownie batter.

P.s. needless to say, I didn't attend any of my reunions hahaha, for lots of different reasons including having a Face Book stalker! Nice memory box, right? Got this from The Wrap Shop at a wedding expo.

P.s. 2: A pickpocket made off with my dad’s Olympus.  Thank goodness there's Nessi!   


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